My life has always been a roller coaster ride. I do not seem to posses the ability to avert off disaster. I ignore the signs of the future because I am literally too lazy to bother until I am smack down in shit. Unfortunately for my family they come along for the same ride.
I married the most stable man I have ever met however, he doesn't like confrontation, even with me. It is his best and worst quality. I think he does actually see the upcoming problems and would like to do something about them but I try to stop him from getting involved so he doesn't. The craziest part is I don't want him to get upset with me if I've done something wrong, just his looking at me or asking a question is too hard for me to deal with.
He has been asking me and asking me to allow him to help with the bills. Finally last night I gave in and he questioned the amount of the phone bill and the cable bill. Well, these two bills I know are high because of the added things I want but we definitely don't need. So he, of course, says that we can cut back on these few things to help out the household as a whole but I don't want that. My solution is not to cut back but for him to ask for a raise. He completely shuts down and our whole conversation is over. I know he's right and I should cut back on a few things and he knows I'm right and he really does deserve a raise and should ask for one but we both know these things are not going to happen so our life will continue on another year in the same up down fashion.
I wish for one day he would just shut off the things we don't need and I wish I could tell his boss the reasons he deserves a raise and that he'll walk if he doesn't get one. I guess my real hope for the future is that our kids are each somewhere in between the both of us. Right now I feel us on the clickity clack, clickity clack going up up up up. This is just the beginning of the 2010 roller coaster, we shall see where this ride takes us. I will say, up or down or spinning on the corkscrew we will be on this ride together smiling, screaming, laughing and crying. What a great life I live!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment